the moon and a man

 

Model of the moon in the Field Columbian Museum, 1898. From the Flickr Commons.

more

To me, seeing Peanut start to use verbal communication ('talking' is a stretch) is one of the most exciting milestones. Like a lot of babies, 'more' is one of his first words. (Pronounced 'mmmo.') At first he just used it for food, because that's the context we used it in, but he quickly decided it was a catch-all for "I would like something specific to happen." Sometimes it means "I would like something to happen and to be honest I'm not entirely sure what it is, but why don't you go ahead and try a few things and I'll let you know if they work for me." I thought that being able to communicate in this way would make life easier for him, but it seems to be making him a bit more frustrated. Like, "I'm telling you what I want! I'm saying MORE and pointing vaguely towards the window or possibly the yoghurt lid or is that a knife? Okay that is definitely what I want MORE of, why are you NOT GIVING IT TO ME."

girl with camel

I should rename this blog 'Small Girls with Ungulates.'

one year

It's really hard to write something on your baby's first birthday that isn't a cliche. But all those phrases about time and change and strangeness are true. No matter how expected they are when other people express them, they're still stunning and weighty when you experience them yourself.

Measurements of time are powerful symbols, and today I'm thinking of the hot February day (it was so hot, my darling! And I was so huge) walking up and down the halls of the hospital, around the grounds, waddling into the little op shop there and buying a Hawaiian shirt you still don't fit into, trying to inspire you to start moving out.

On this day a year ago you weren't in the world. You were in another universe, inside me. You weren't in the world and then suddenly you were, and you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

the baby is teething. again.

Parenting was so much easier in the old days.

girl with goat

I have so many images saved to my hard drive that I thought I might start sharing a few on my blog. I haven't had any luck finding the photographer or the source for this beautiful photo of a Mongolian girl and her baby goat, so I apologise. One time I fed goats at a farm/petting zoo and they were very aggressive and I got scared and I climbed on a rock and they followed me and climbed up too because they are goats and I was holding the feed above my head because I was scared that they would bite my hand and they were jumping up and my husband had to save me by taking the feed off me and distracting them while I ran away (I was on my honeymoon and I was twenty-nine years old).

back to work

Image courtesy Southern Methodist University, 

Central University Libraries, DeGolyer Library via Flickr Commons 

I've gone back to work for three days a week. I had an entire year of maternity leave, and even though it was the shortest year of my life, it feels like forever since I've sat at a desk. The first week it felt like I was doing some strange new exercise, sitting and typing instead of the usual laying on the floor/crawling on hands and knees/carrying a ten-kilo baby on my hip while I try to fill a kettle. Also I can wear jewellery, as temptingly shiny and dangly as I like, and there is no-one to try to pull it off or eat it! Three days is an excellent number of days to work. It's enough for me to feel grateful that I get the rest of the week with Peanut, and the four days with him is juuust enough to make me feel grateful to go to work.

Peanut is 11 months old and is developing so fast it's daunting.

 

He loves buses and blueberries and balls and books and probably also things that don't start with B but I can't think of them right now. If you say "Cheeky grin!" he gurns manically and shows you all six teeth. If he enters a room with a fan, he will spot it immediately and let you know it is off and probably needs to be turned on. He is affectionate and he loves seeing photos of himself and when his father or I walk into the room he smiles like he hasn't seen us for days. Looking at this photo and thinking about him is making me miss him and want to scoop him up and kiss him. I keep thinking, I don't want him to get any older! But then he does and he's even more beautiful and interesting and fun. It's tiring feeling so many different things at once.