Friday, January 11, 2013

get out of my face about breastfeeding

Vader geeft baby de fles / Father feeding the baby

First of all, the inevitable disclaimer: I intend to breastfeed my child. It's cheap, it's handy and convenient, it's good for babies. It also seems like a nice thing to do, and I hope I can do it without too many problems.

However, as any currently/recently pregnant woman can tell you, there is currently a huge pressure on women to breastfeed, and it's really starting to piss me off.

Yes, it's great that hospitals and doctors and more supportive of breastfeeding these days. It's great that they acknowledge that breastfeeding isn't always easy, and that women should have access to support them. However, the rhetoric of breastfeeding often makes me feel uncomfortable.

"It's natural!" Meaning, of course, it's good. (And, by extension, formula feeding is "unnatural" and therefore bad.) I have to say, as soon as I hear the word "natural", my hackles rise and my skepticism goes on alert. Here are some other things that are unnatural:
  • wearing spectacles to correct your sight
  • eating with a knife and fork
  • taking drugs to prevent epileptic seizures
  • reading
Also, the word "natural" has been used a lot to justify ideologies which most of us would agree are highly problematic: sexism, racism, homophobia. So let's stop using that one as an argument, OK?

"It's best for baby!" Yes, if all other elements are equal, breast milk is better for a baby than formula. (Except that it doesn't have enough iron.) However, all elements are never equal.

If a mother is in agony trying to breastfeed, that might not be best for baby.

If a mother has to take drugs to breastfeed, that might not be best for baby.

If a mother is traumatised and made to feel inadequate by her difficulty breastfeeding, that might not be best for baby.

And how about this for a radical argument: the baby is not the only person involved here, and women have a right to choose what is best for them.

I am frankly amazed at some of the comments I have seen on the Internet regarding formula feeding. Women who opt for this method are called selfish. They are told that if they didn't want to fully devote their body and their life to their child, they shouldn't have one. They are told that they are damaging their children. It's very reminiscent of the arguments against mothers working outside the home.

It's not just on the Internet, either. One woman I know of was looking at formula on the shelves of a supermarket, trying to decide between brands in case she had to supplement in the future. A complete stranger walked past and chirped brightly, "Breast is best!" Thanks, judgmental stranger! I spent pregnancy and birth alone in a cave and this is my first outing; I appreciate your advice! Also, let me punch you in your stupid FACE.

Women have the right to decide what to do with their own bodies. If you do not agree with this, or you want to add caveats, then brother, we have a more fundamental disagreement than I can address here.

"Your baby will have a higher IQ!" This is a very common and very powerful argument, except it's based on shitty science.
A large study recently co-conducted by the University of Edinburgh and Scotland’s Medical Research Council found that breastfed babies do indeed tend to be smarter than formula-fed babies. But it also found that mothers who breastfeed also tend to have higher IQs and more education, and tend to provide more stimulating home environments than formula-feeding mothers. Once the numbers were corrected to account for the mom’s IQ, the relationship between breastfeeding and intelligence disappeared. (And there was no statistical difference between siblings when one was breastfed and one wasn’t.) The study, analyzing data on nearly 5,500 American children, was published in the British Medical Journal in October 2006. Previous studies, for the most part, hadn’t factored in the mom’s IQ when declaring that breastfeeding made babies smarter.
(The same article also debunks the rather more superficial but probably equally powerful argument that breastfeeding helps you lose weight. It doesn't.)

"You'll have a stronger bond with your baby!" Well, that's a nice big fuck-you to adoptive parents, people medically unable to breastfeed, and mothers whose babies fail to thrive on their milk. This is sentimental and anecdotal; there is no evidence to support it.

"Formula is no substitute for breast milk." Actually, it's a damn good substitute. It doesn't have the antibodies provided in breast milk, but it's carefully designed to meet a child's nutritional needs. No-one should feel that they are depriving their child, or harming its health, by formula feeding. And the studies on breast milk are severely limited by the lack of attention paid to other factors such as wealth and socioecomonic class:
It is true that breastfed babies are healthier in many ways than formula-fed ones. But does that in and of itself prove a causal relationship between health and breast milk? Women who breastfeed tend to be wealthier and better educated than women who don’t, so it’s hard to tease apart how much of the benefit to their children comes from breastfeeding and how much comes from other factors correlated with money and education. (For instance, women who breastfeed are less likely to smoke.)
Finally, let's address a fact that very few breastfeeding advocates seem to acknowledge. While women get the blame for not breastfeeding, our society makes it difficult to breastfeed. Most women in Australia and other Western countries do not get much maternity leave; certainly not the minimum of a year which is recommended by breastfeeding advocates. When they return to work, they may choose to pump; however, many women do not work in jobs where they can take breaks to do this, where an appropriate space is provided, or where their workmates and supervisors are sympathetic to their needs. This is both a women's issue and a class issue, and there's no point throwing money at public education campaigns if it is not addressed.

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

2013

Nieuwjaarskinderen / Born on New Year's Day 
 Born on New Year's Day. From the Flickr Commons.

I love making New Year's resolutions. I've even managed to keep some. This year, though, I'm not going to try to achieve anything but this:

Stay sane and healthy.

No clean house, no weight loss, no artistic achievements. Just try not to lose my fucking mind with the insane life change coming my way in February.

The pregnancy is going well, by the way. I am 35 weeks in and the baby has turned head-down (turns out that when I thought I was gently cradling his head, I had his bum cupped instead). He has started grinding his head into my pelvis as though blindly searching for the way out. Please don't be impatient, baby. If you don't give me some more time, you're going to end up sleeping on a pile of laundry because that's what's taking up the space where your cot will be.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

birth plan


Today I am 30 weeks pregnant. Three-quarters of the way through; shit is getting serious. The books are telling me to make a birth plan to give to my hospital, so I did, and I thought I'd share it with you.

  1. Whale sounds will be played until full cervical dilation is reached and the pushing stage begins. At this point Led Zeppelin’s Immigrant Song will be played on a loop. Midwives are encouraged to learn the words and sing along (lyrics provided, see Appendix). If you are tone-deaf please only mouth the lyrics!

  1. I will be wearing a horned Viking helmet throughout labour. (This will need to be sterilised.) Please do not attempt to engage me in a debate about the historical authenticity of horned helmets.

  1. Our videographer will be present throughout the labour, however he will only be filming my face (NOTHING BELOW THE NECK) in order to record my spiritual journey. This will later be released as a DVD entitled My Triumph and will be made available to hospital staff at wholesale price.

  1. My husband will cut the cord with a broadsword (will need to be sterilised).

  1. My husband will wrap the still-bloody infant in furs (to be provided by the hospital).

  1. My husband will place my son on my bared breast.

  1. Medical staff will file past the bedside paying tribute to my son and myself. (Tribute in the literal sense; gold coins will be provided.) All medical staff who assisted in the birth will take part, although other staff are welcome to join. Please do not look me in the eye! I will be gazing at my son.

  1. My son will gaze back at me, full of awe at the goddess-like creature who brought him into this world.

  1. I will be served a cheese platter.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

holiday: south-western australia

We wanted to have one last little holiday before the baby comes, so we went south to Bridgetown. We like old-people holidays: driving to a small town, staying in a little house, driving around to other small towns. We like to go into op-shops and look at old buildings and funny little museums and take photos of fallen logs. Then at night we like to read and go to bed early. We have very convenient tastes for people without much money and with a baby on the way.

Here are a few photos I took of spring in the south-west of Western Australia.





 Protea in a garden in Donnybrook.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

vintage baby: the horror

If you have a lot of spare time that you would like to get rid of, may I suggest getting pregnant, going to Etsy, and typing 'baby' in the vintage section? This will also help you get rid of any pesky money you have lying around.

However, in amongst the adorable lurks... the horror. Let me show you some of the things I have seen, and can never unsee. (Click on the image to buy it, IF YOU DARE.)


OH GOD NO


Why do people think crying dolls are so cute? This is seriously upsetting, although that might be partly because they look like Dr Moreau-esque half-monkey creatures.


These things are called Plumpees, and they reflect a very different attitude to childhood obesity.


SINISTER.


I WATCHING YEW! HEE HEE HEE!


Well there's the opening credits for the next season of American Horror Story.


This thing is a bank. It works because once you drop money in, you never want to touch it again.


An adorable depiction of BOUNDLESS RAGE.


You better pray, kid.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

the thing that's making me happy today

...is how much this baby bear on Cute Overload looks like Maurice Sendak's Little Bear.



Monday, September 10, 2012

inspiration: colour


From Marc Jacob's Resort 2013 collection. Wear all your clothes, wear them all at once


 Mandarin ducks, the most beautiful ducks


No post about colour would be complete without a Mary Blair painting. 


Giant pencils by Jonna Pohjalainen


Anonymous artist. Found at Project Thirty-Three, an amazing collection of vintage album covers designed with typography and simple shapes.